EPISODE 151 INTERVIEW WITH IRIS GOLDFEDER: THE IMPORTANCE OF AUTHENTICITY AND POSITIVITY IN MARKETING

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EPISODE 151 INTERVIEW WITH IRIS GOLDFEDER: THE IMPORTANCE OF AUTHENTICITY AND POSITIVITY IN MARKETING

The Importance of Authenticity and Positivity in Marketing

My guest today is Iris Goldfeder, Owner and CEO of GasStoveCreative, and one of the hosts of The Cookbook podcast. Join us as we discuss the importance of authenticity and positivity in marketing, the risks involved in marketing tactics that seem too good to be true, and why it is important to connect as a human first, whether you are working on your own marketing, talking to prospective clients, or working with current clients.

Resources

Transcript

Transcribed by Otter.ai

 

Erin Marcus  

Got it. Got it. All right, welcome. Welcome to this episode of The ready yet Podcast. I’m excited to have Iris Goldfeder here with me with Gas Stove Creative. I almost didn’t say I don’t know what almost came out there, but it wasn’t going to be there. But I’m excited to hit record because we could be chatting and going on and on and on and you have a story you’re gonna tell me but we’re waiting to hit record. But before we get into all that, why don’t you give everybody a little more formal introduction to who you are and what you do.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Okay, well, what I do is not who I am. So I am Iris Goldfeder. I am owner and CEO of gusto creative, we are an all in one marketing solution based out of Lafayette, Indiana. I’ve been in the marketing arena for 25 years plus got fired about nine years ago and decided I never want to work for anybody again, and here I am. It’s been a great ride. And it’s, it’s still going. So the key right, that’s that is the key. And I love it.

 

Erin Marcus  

I love what I do. That’s awesome. Before we hit record, we were having a conversation that I always find interesting, because so I grew up in Chicago, you grew up in New York, like around a lot of people from all the countries from all the backgrounds and one of the things I said I always try to ask my guests to confirm how they say their name. So I get it correctly, to be appropriate there. But I always say growing up in Chicago with all the different people learning how to pronounce different people’s names, there’s a benefit, like we learned how to pronounce all the things because we had all of the languages in the melting pot of this, right? We’re talking about your accent versus my accent because I don’t have

 

Iris Goldfeder  

an accent. I don’t know what you’re talking about.

 

Erin Marcus  

I have been told I don’t know what they’re talking about. But I have been told that I have a reasonably strong Chicago accent, whatever.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Whatever I think it’s like in the A’s and when you know, in New York, it’s like with the RS, and the end the odds like so, you know, coffee I’ve been in the Midwest for I don’t know, like 1718 years. So we had the conversation. My mom, you know, said I will enunciate or die. So I learned how to pronounce my arse for the most part. And but when I speak with a fellow east coaster, I devolve within five minutes. And I’m talking like this. And we got the thing going and the family and the whole thing. And yeah, so actually at five o’clock, I have a meeting with a guy Sam Liebowitz. And it was gonna go to hell, like I already know where it’s going. So

 

Erin Marcus  

One of my college roommates was from Southern Illinois and had a heavy, heavy, heavy southern accent. And I used to say all the time, and at the time a teenager out of Chicago, I had no I had very limited exposure to that. And that was to me quite No, I grew up with people from 22 different countries. The thing that was the novelty was southern America, right? That was a novelty. So you say to her all the time, I won’t pay attention to what you’re saying. But can I just listen to you talk because as soon as she got on the phone with her mom, it came back. full, full full

 

Iris Goldfeder  

force, right. So what I was telling you was, I’m a musician, and I wrote a song for a homeless shelter in New York, you know, full transparency. I was homeless when I was 19. They took me in and I always believed in, you know, paying it forward. And so I always went back and helped and volunteered. And I figured you know, I have this gift. Let’s do it. So I wrote a couple of songs, but one of them was called Living on the edge. And I wrote that title before Aerosmith. I just wanted to throw that out there on it. I am owning it, but and, you know, we recorded it in New York in a studio with my friends doing backup vocals and all that stuff. And my sister outlaws because we kept her in the marriage. Her sister, who I call my cousin, has a television production company. And she said come to Chicago. We’ll film you know, we’ll record it at this really cool studio and I think they were called Oh, shoot something six. I can’t remember what they were but it was like something six and they were the best jingle singers. Oh, wow. I like Chicago. So I’m like, Okay,

 

Erin Marcus  

we’re big. We’re big advertising.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Oh, big, big. I mean, it was phenomenal. I mean, I look at the pictures and it was a hell of an experience but so, you know, I get into the studio and one of the lines in the song is we’re all one underneath this pain. And so we get into the studio First off, they start singing and I’m like, I am not. I will wait until you’re done with your part because there is no way in hell. I’m singing with the people I, you know, I felt like literally like a teeny little ant amongst these giants. And there was this one woman, peaches who did this gospel roll and like my knees literally went weak. But so you know, so the line in the song was, you know, we’re all one underneath this pain. And so, we go into the studio, and they do their thing. And I go in, and I’m like, where all one underneath this pain, he goes, cut. Like, why? He goes, it’s where I said, That’s what I said. He said, No, you said where? And I said, No, I said, where? And he goes, No, it’s we’re. So I said, Okay, so I go back in and again, it’s like 15 takes. And then he goes, thinking we are like we are and I went, Oh, we are he went? Yes. So 15 takes later I got it. But it was hilarious. Because I’m going to wear all one he’s like, cut. And it becomes who’s in the first situation. I really did. Because I’m like, What do you mean, where I said, where he goes? No, you’re saying you’re saying we’re not we’re? And I’m like, I don’t understand what the hell the difference is. It was. It was pretty comical. But anyway, we got the time and they were very cool. They were amazing. Are you

 

Erin Marcus  

still musical in nature? In general? Do you still get to practice?

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Well, I have a piano and I do play. I was in a band up till about three and a half years ago, it was actually hard rock and metal. Well, I’ve done everything from like, the classics to whatever. And that was the only thing that I hadn’t done yet. And I was like, you know, let’s do this. But I quit, unfortunately, for political differences, and not because, you know, to me, whatever you believe in whoever you vote for, that’s none of my business. But when you start bringing it into practice, and you start talking derogatorily that’s not my thing. So,

 

Erin Marcus  

you know, that’s a really good segue, because you mentioned you’re, you know, you’re a marketing agency, or all in one marketing. I also work heavily heavily in marketing as I’m helping my clients grow their businesses. And that’s something that is reasonably recent in the marketplace. Because up until recently, now, there are certain topics, right? There’s certain extreme topics that have always been like, no, that’s not okay. No, that’s not okay. But now, there’s this situation where, because everybody knows everything about each other. Everybody’s screaming everything from the rooftops are not everybody, but too many people. And like, because that’s how things get solved. Evidently, according to most people, I find it absurd that people think that works.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

And we’ll have that conversation off here. And we’ll be on this for like, four hours. So

 

Erin Marcus  

effective use of your voice. effective uses of your voice

 

Iris Goldfeder  

100%. That is not it. Yeah.

 

Erin Marcus  

Are you? I can honestly say, because I like you. There are certain things where I’m like, No, that’s not okay. Like, I have my black and white. And everything else is like you’re entitled to your opinion. I have not had it come up. I have not had it come up with my clients. Were in their marketing. Now to believe social media and to believe the news. You would think this is the most predominant problem businesses are having. Right? Right. But I really, like most people individually or normally, like people together is great. People are weird, right? Yes. And here’s the thing.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

And, you know, I may see it more than you do, because I’m gay. And I’m in

 

Erin Marcus  

Lafayette, Indiana, your Lafayette and just call it what it is.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

And, and you know, I mean, I love Lafayette. Lafayette has amazing people. They have amazing restaurants, you know, you would think, you know, I’m a New Yorker, you’re right, exactly. Food snob. So you would think, Oh, my God, good restaurants, you know, of course, you know, I know half the people that own the good restaurants. That’s like another story. But I have had people I apologize for the background noise like that cannot be avoided that they decide to wrestle every time I do

 

Erin Marcus  

eventually be a cat. That is perfect.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

But I have had people you know, not do business with me because I’m gay. And I have chosen not to do business with people because of their views. Because you know, for me. I live in authenticity, including in my business, and I don’t believe in alienating anybody. You know, because then, you know, you’ll lose half the market, right? However, I’m like you, I have my black and white and there are some things that are okay. And there’s some and there are some things that just are not. And, you know, I, I used to have to work with everybody and anybody and you know, sit there and be like, Oh my god, what is this person saying now? I don’t, I don’t have to listen to it. And, and it’s been interesting, but I will say that that is only maybe 10% of the time, which is really good. And now a lot of my clients are also nationals. So there’s that.

 

Erin Marcus  

Yeah, it is interesting, because you think about who you want to give your money to who you don’t want to give your money to. And there’s a very big difference between making those choices and making those choices a problem for other people. Yeah. Yeah.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

And as marketers, right, we have to, you know, if we, if we don’t care about the client, they’re not going to get the best out of us. Right? Absolutely.

 

Erin Marcus  

I mean, it’s not an alignment there. And the other way, I also, like, have a hard time doing a great job for someone whose business I don’t think is actually viable. Yes. And I’ve watched coaches and other entities sell an expensive out an expensive solution to somebody who would never get an ROI on it. Right, because their business model isn’t capable of it.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

You know, but that’s where ethics and integrity comes in. I mean, you know, I know, within 15 minutes of a conversation, if I can help somebody, I mean, you just know, or if I can work with that person, nevermind if I can help them. I mean, and I’m not being, you know, I don’t want people to force me to say what, or if they can

 

Erin Marcus  

work with me, or Yeah,

 

Iris Goldfeder  

I mean, it goes both ways. Right, and I don’t want people listening to think like, Oh, my God, she’s like an asshole. And you know,

 

Erin Marcus  

It’s a total two way street. Yes, those who do not like me don’t like my style and don’t like my approach. It would be hard for me to help them. But we’re out of alignment. I will, right?

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Yes, 100%, you’ve got to be aligned, I feel that our values need to be aligned. And I don’t mean political values. I mean, are your values, our business values, our you know, just our values in general need to be aligned. I had a guy who was so funny. It was with the business that I’m not with anymore. But I had a guy and he had a landscaping business and was a really great guy. And he started talking about politics. And I was like,

 

Erin Marcus  

I want to continue to like you. Please stop talking now. And I said, Yeah,

 

Iris Goldfeder  

I said, How about how about if we don’t have this conversation, right? And he goes, Oh, you’re a, you’re a lib. I said, No, I’m a lesbian. And he looked at me like, and he started laughing. He just started laughing. And he said effing che. And I said, I said, What You See Is What You Get. I said, so we can do this one or two ways, right? I said, you know, we can bring politics into it. And then we can work together, or we can kind of meet where we’re supposed to meet. And we can make this work. And he literally was like, like, I love you. I want to work with you. Right? And we did. And but it was like, the funniest thing, because it could have gone a whole nother way. Right? And so you have to,

 

Erin Marcus  

you know, the word now is authenticity, right? Authenticity 100%. And I think and this is also what we’re talking about, because there’s authenticity in my marketing, in that you will see what I agree with you will it’s not a surprise to anybody, because I’m not pretending to be anything I’m not and I think if you just present your authentic self, it can often solve or avoid, like, my business is not where I choose to have those conversations.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Right? I mean, and it shouldn’t be that’s not what it should be about. And you know, you say your authentic self and I don’t know if we talked about this, I had a coach tell me eight years ago, whatever, you know, be less you.

 

Erin Marcus  

Yeah, good luck with that.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

I have If I said, So what do you mean? Well, you know, you’re in New York and Lafayette, and you’re a little intense. The thing was, I listened to him. And you know, for the first like, four months, I was like, Yeah, I’m getting business. I feel like I’m lying.

 

Erin Marcus  

When there’s a very big difference between being less you, which is such a judgy. Oh, terrible time as opposed to, this is part of how you communicate that could use a little tweaking. And that would have, you’d been like, oh, like, for example, I’ll give you an example. I have a client. I love her. She’s amazing. I’m so proud of what she has taken that we’ve done and grown with it. And it’s frickin amazing. And when she hired me, she said, Erin, I love you. I have a hard time with swearing. That was very, she goes, I love you. I know you can help me. I have a very hard time with swearing. And I said, Okay, that’s fair. I mean, that’s fair. And I said, Okay, I will not promise you, I will never swear, because it’s such a habit that I don’t think about it. But I have zero problems making an effort while we’re talking.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Do not do that. Right. So be cognizant of the fact that that bothers you

 

Erin Marcus  

doesn’t hurt me at all. Right? To try now. If you know, I speak for a living, there’s no swearing on other people’s stages. So it’s not like I’m completely out of control of myself. We’re right.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

And I, you know, I when I first meet somebody, because, I mean, I’m a sailor, I mean, you know, at the end of the day I am, it’s and I wait, I wait for them to say the first ship, the first book, The first, whatever. And once they do it, it’s like, it’s like gloves off. And here we go.

 

Erin Marcus  

But if they recommend, how do you recommend to people, since we’re having this conversation, find the balance between their authentic self and the version of people who think that gives them the right to be a jerk?

 

Iris Goldfeder  

No. So here’s the thing. being your authentic self, and, and not everybody is for everybody. Oh, god. Yeah. Right. I mean, you know, let’s face it, right? So, for me, being my authentic self didn’t mean that I could curse and didn’t mean whatever. And didn’t mean, I wasn’t going to be intense. I am intense. And I’m intense, because I am passionate about what I do. So I don’t think it’s intense. I think it’s passion. That’s, that’s how I look at it, right? And all of the people who sign up with me sign up with me because of my passion. They sign up with me, because I may, you know, I’m real. I will tell them something that they don’t want to hear because they need to hear it. You know, you know what I’m saying? I mean, they need to hear it. So if I don’t tell them, I feel that I’m doing a disservice now how that’s delivered. Right? I think that’s part of it. But it’s all about communication. You know, my wife, you know, we were 20 years and we’re still learning communication there. You know, like, we had a conversation last week, and she said, I’m just letting you know,

 

Erin Marcus  

nothing good comes after I’m just letting you in. I was like, Okay, no, did

 

Iris Goldfeder  

you know now when I say something to her, she’ll be like, Yeah, well, you do that too. And I went ninja ninja. No, that’s, that’s not what we do. And she just kind of looked at me, you know, but we talked about it. And so, but that’s it. It’s communicating. And

 

Erin Marcus  

it’s communicating, but also being open to receiving the communication? Well, yeah. Like communicating in two ways. I think there’s people, if you’re looking for a reason to be offended, it’s very easy to find one. If you’re looking for a reason for someone to be wrong. It’s very easy. We’re all wrong all the time. This is not a hard thing to find. Right? This is very easy to find where we’re wrong. So where do you know, it’s where you want to default? Do you default to giving someone the benefit of the doubt? I’ll give you an example. That meant it was a big eye opener for me. With the idea of tipping in restaurants, and every now and then you get bad service, right?

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Um, so we’re gonna be right on we’re gonna have us to punish

 

Erin Marcus  

this person who gave you bad service with less of a tip. What if you approach them without knowing their situation? Now it’s one thing if you go back And the same person is bad over and over and over again. But how do you know that that person isn’t at work? Because they have no choice but to be there when their kid is sick? Like, you don’t know that that person isn’t having the worst day of their life and has to be there anyway? What if you came with empathy instead of judgment? Right? So there’s,

 

Iris Goldfeder  

For me, there’s a couple of sides to that coin. Because I used to be in restaurant management.

 

Erin Marcus  

Yeah, that’s the most terrifying business to me out of all the businesses in the country, the idea of having to carry hot food, like, yeah, I’ve never done it. I’ve worked in a hotdog stand that

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Oh, my God, I had to tear, I had to help out one day, and I’m like, walking around with this tray. I

 

Erin Marcus  

don’t know how they do it,

 

Iris Goldfeder  

I do not put it on your hand, and they walk around and they swing it like, you know, I think

 

Erin Marcus  

if I sit on my ass, and you bring me food, you are like, the most amazing human?

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Yes. Well, but here’s the thing. And, and I’m true, I believe this. I used to have a tip ometer.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

And the tip would start at 25%. And then, depending on the service, it would either, you know, and there’s a reason why. Because when you are in the service industry, you know, yeah, you can have a bad day. But you can. Not that you can’t show it, but you can’t be rude. It’s your bread and butter.

 

Erin Marcus  

There’s a difference. I’m not talking rudely. I’m talking like,

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Oh, you mean? Like they’re all for service? No, I mean, for that. I always give 20% I mean, you know, that’s just my rule, I give 20% If they’re rude, or, you know, unattentive or inattentive in the way, that, you know, I’m sitting there for 40 minutes before they come back and ask if I want, you know, a refill on my whatever, then that’s an issue, because to me, they don’t care that I’m there. There’s, you know, many restaurants that I’ve been in, where they had been slammed. And within 10 minutes, that, you know, the waiter or waitress came back and, you know, came up, we’re really busy. I’m sorry, you know, is there anything that you need? You know, having that awareness, I get that, that, sir, trust me, I get that that’s their livelihood. And I know what they make, you know, per hour, you know, without tips, so in most places, so I get it. And I’m not one of those elite people that it’s like, oh, well, you didn’t treat me properly. So Screw you, you know, but if you’re going to be rude, then you know, we’re gonna have a problem. I think I’ve only left 10% probably twice in my life. And we know I’m old. So you know,

 

Erin Marcus  

you know, is I’m listening to all the different directions that our conversation is taking, I think the theme you enact as a human first, oh,

 

Iris Goldfeder  

100%,

 

Erin Marcus  

right. Connect as a human first, whether you’re working on your marketing in your business, whether you’re talking to prospects, and clients that don’t align with all of your beliefs, whether you’re in a situation where the other person is not delivering to your expectations. 99% of these situations can be resolved if you just start out connecting as a human first.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

I love that. I love that. And you’re 100% Right. And I don’t think I think people I don’t think people think of it now. Because now it’s so divisive.

 

Erin Marcus  

Well, we’re also regardless of the divisive, we are just also obsessed with our own crap. And we’re also in it is the way our brains work. There’s a little bit of neuro neuroscience going on. But we’re also obsessed with our own period of heartstart . We are obsessed with our own that, imagine if we all just took one second step back. And you know, connect as a human first, it’s taking that pause. Now, that’s easy for us to be set in and I’m sure you had different experiences than I do. I’m not talking about situations where you are discriminated against where you are, you know, that’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about our run of the mill average in experiences. That I think a lot of people, because we’re both in the business of helping others grow their businesses, they let these types of situations stop them. I don’t want to say anything, because what if someone interprets it this way? I don’t want to do anything. What if somebody doesn’t like me? And I kind of go out there knowing that there’s a lot of people that don’t like me, right? That’s okay. Yeah, a lot of people to do. Right. And actually probably more to do than don’t do depends on the day and how

 

Iris Goldfeder  

you look at the end of the day. You know, I was told, you know, I was told, I’m very polarizing, because either people like me or they don’t.

 

Erin Marcus  

And I tend to get that as well.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Right? And well, because we’re strong women. Well, and

 

Erin Marcus  

The way it was described to me as the reason people don’t like me is that I’m basically a mirror. And do they like what they think about themselves? Compared to what? Because I’m strong? Because I’m so driven, right? And as for me, I’m one of the least judgmental people you’ll find.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Right? But yeah, you know, I, I think, especially in marketing. And maybe it’s just the people that I’m coming across now. And maybe it’s because it’s national, and it’s not, you know, local. A lot of the people that I am meeting are very heart centered. And so, it’s easy for them to choose me and me to choose them. Easy, like, like that. I think I had a meeting with a prospective client. I think three weeks ago, and it took two weeks for, you know, them say, Okay, let’s move forward. You know, there were two more conversations. And it was fine. And it was never about personality, it never came down to ability, great figuring out how to do for me, what’s sales 101? Wi I fm? What’s in it for me?

 

Erin Marcus  

Well, and here’s the thing back to our thoughts about authenticity. That doesn’t happen, like friction, I had a conversation with a guest. I won’t say earlier, because they have no idea what order these get dropped in. But earlier today, I’m talking about frictionless action, and meaning, things that you don’t have to force, okay. And in our version, yours in mind, and our version of this conversation to me, if you want frictionless action, if you want things to happen without force, it starts with authenticity, because you can, like attracts like. And so if you want to make things easier on yourself, and again, I’m talking about authenticity, not an excuse to be a jerk and judge other people saying I know my truth, that’s not what we’re talking about.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

No, there’s a difference between being authentic and being rude and abrasive. I mean, you know.

 

Erin Marcus  

And the other thing, I’d love to get your opinion on this. The other thing that I’m not a fan of, I call it woe is me marketing. I always call it marketing. I haven’t heard other people call it that. But that was what made me chuckle at myself. There is a difference between authenticity, and sharing every trial and tribulation of your world, in the hope someone takes pity on you. It’s just so clearly contrary to yours, and my personality that we can’t even conceive of it. It feels like a bad idea. But you do see it. You do see it where people are out there sharing their woe is me story in the hopes of you choosing them,

 

Iris Goldfeder  

which is awful. I mean, it’s just, you know, it’s in the guise

 

Erin Marcus  

of authenticity. I’m just telling you,

 

Iris Goldfeder  

yeah, but you know, and one of the things that I’m, I’m not a fan of is well, I just did a video on this yesterday, it’ll probably be on LinkedIn next week, but positive marketing, instead of negative marketing. When you’re talking to a client instead of going, Man, you are, you are not doing this the way that it should be done. You are not doing that, man, this what made you like that idea, right? And for me, it’s like, wow, you know, you have done this and this great. You This is awesome. Let’s build on that. Without even mentioning the stuff that they don’t know. Because, no, you know, nobody wants to feel like an idiot. Right? And I’ve seen it like I remember I was in a sales meeting one day and I have never cringed so much in my life. Where the guy was literally like, you know, yeah, this, this doesn’t work. And no wonder you don’t stop listening to you. Oh, my God. The way

 

Erin Marcus  

you deliver your advice, people will stop listening to you just out of self preservation.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Because at that point, they’re like, oh my god, I’m like, this giant loser. And, and I remember looking at that going I will, oh my god, like I will never

 

Erin Marcus  

well. Also intention, my I will point out, let’s do this not that this is why that work. This is why that didn’t happen. But it’s also my intention. Right? It’s you’re not

 

Iris Goldfeder  

saying, you know this? Didn’t you know that you shouldn’t have done this? It’s like you try this. And it wasn’t successful. But this is probably why so let’s try this.

 

Erin Marcus  

And the difference is you’re coming from like, right, like, where are you coming from? The differences are you and this is a great thing like to always ask yourself almost to the point, if not to the point of writing it out before you do anything. What am I trying to accomplish? Because we lie to ourselves all the time. And we say, well, I just want to help the other person. Yeah. You know what the person who is braiding someone, their goal is to make themselves feel better not to help the other person? Yeah.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Well, you know, there’s that adage, hurt people hurt people. And I think that’s bullshit. mean people hurt people. I mean, I’m sorry, not

 

Erin Marcus  

resolved. There’s a lot of hurt people who have worked on their hurts, and they do not continue to do

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Well, yeah, when you work on it, and you get through it. But if you’re not willing to even recognize it, because I’ve, I’ve, I’ve been on the other end of it, and I, you know, coming home being like, Oh, my God, I suck. And my wife is like, you know, it has zero to do with you. I had a guy that I mentored who went to do a sale. And I guess the deal was done. And then the wife came out. And she’s like, No, this is a scam all you people blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And he was like, What are you talking about? Like this is done. And the guy was like, Man, my wife doesn’t want to do this. We’re not doing this. And he said, well, obviously you don’t know your shit. And like, left, and he called me up. And I said, So You do realize that you just poured five gallons of gasoline on that and lit a match, because that is gone. Right is never going to be another opportunity. I said those are eligible? Right? If it happens,

 

Erin Marcus  

if you took a pause

 

Iris Goldfeder  

and saw how upset she was, and said, Wow, you just asked her a question. No, like, you know, you must have had a really bad marketing experience.

 

Erin Marcus  

You know, what happened? Right? What? Yeah, sounds like a connected question. I don’t know what

 

Iris Goldfeder  

she could still say, I don’t have to tell you anything, get the ad here, where she may sit and be like, Okay, this is what happened. But you didn’t even make that an option. Like that was never going to be an option at that point. So,

 

Erin Marcus  

and that was something that I learned, right? That’s practice because you can’t take it personally. Right? It does take a lot of practice. And I will tell you, no matter how good an edit, things will happen, they’ll throw you and you just kind of learn to observe your own behavior instead of reacting to things they say and this is absolutely true that owning a business the entrepreneurial journey is the biggest self improvement journey you’ll ever go.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Oh, like, I will say and I know 1,000% But 1,000% Because you know it opened your eyes to so many things like to to how how you deal with certain situations, you know, you you have to change yeah, you know, if I was the hothead that I was at 30 Now I I’d be working in McDonald’s probably not there’s anything wrong working.

 

Erin Marcus  

They would have fired you by now.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

They would have been like oh my god, like you know,

 

Erin Marcus  

yelling at the customers here.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Well, what do you mean you didn’t want cheese? What the hell’s the matter with you? It says right here cheese buddy wants cheese it’s just so funny though. I mean, and the entrepreneurial journey I think for me has been loaded it’s been loaded with so many different experiences right like you know good not so good and completely eye opening

 

Erin Marcus  

Let’s do this because it’s one of my things. I say this all the time. It’s one of my favorite things to do. I call it lessening your learning curve for the audience. Just don’t do it the way I did it, you’ll be better off there you go. So what would be something like i Whenever I asked this, my guests are like, Oh, where do we even start but like what’s a failure? What’s something you did that we can lessen someone’s learning curve and just say don’t do it that way. I already tried it. Oh.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

One particular thing comes to mind but

 

Iris Goldfeder  

don’t I don’t I don’t know how to free okay. Don’t look for what you think is the easy way.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Because it is not. If something looks easy. Just think of if you ever watched last since face danger Will Robinson danger? Well, let me tell you. Because if it looks too easy, so true oh

 

Erin Marcus  

my god, i Those are probably some of my most expensive mistakes.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Oh my god, it’ll be easy.

 

Erin Marcus  

Yeah, no, I never want let’s

 

Iris Goldfeder  

go this route. It’s gonna

 

Erin Marcus  

write those instantaneous results. It’s not gonna happen, you know, I’ll just do a little bit. It’s not that it has to be hard. But if someone’s offering you instantaneous, perfect results. That’s not how business works. What do they say though? That 10 year overnight success, right? I mean, it’s just not exactly.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Well, I had a guy, you know, we were doing SEO. And this was like, eight years ago, or eight or nine years ago, and we were charging what we were charging. And yeah, it’s not cheap. I mean, you know, it’s not. So he calls me up. And he goes, Yeah, he goes, I’m dropping your service. And I said, Why? Because well, I had a guy call me up. And he told me that he could get me on top of the first page of Google number one in two days for 100 bucks. And I said, what? I said, Don’t do it. You’re gonna get blackballed. I said, I’m telling you, you’re gonna get in trouble. Don’t do it. If you don’t want to stay with me, that’s fine. But please go somewhere ethical, because this is not ethical. And he said, Yeah, yeah, whatever. I checked Google two days later, and he was number one. And then he was gone a week later. And I mean, gone. I couldn’t find him on the page, you know, I went to like, wow, eighth page. Nothing gone. Why? Because what they did back then, say years ago, loaded his page with keywords. And I mean, like, I don’t even know how many keywords they did.

 

Erin Marcus  

Right? And to be able to do that it wasn’t in the content. You tagged it in the background?

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Right? Yeah. You can’t do that anymore. Well, there’s a reason why you can’t do it anymore. But so he was gone. He called me back three weeks later, after two years to fix that problem. He’s like, I am, like, I’m nowhere. And I am never one to say I told you, so. I thought about it and chuckled to myself. Because seriously, I was like, so adamant about it. And you know, and I said, I don’t even know, with this domain that I can fix that. And he said, What do you mean, I said, you, you’ve been blackballed. Write it out. Like, yeah, you’re, you’re like out of the club. I said, you know, we can keep our eye on it for a month and see if there’s any movement. But if there’s not you, we need a new domain for you. And we had to get a new domain for him. That’s brutal. And I just remember going, you know,

 

Erin Marcus  

Are you doing the work? No, there isn’t a way around doing the work.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

No, no. And I think that if, if we can, and I think that’s where the authentic piece comes from, right? If we’re really, you know, empathetic, and we’re just like, you know, this. Am I the best person out there? I mean, you know, I think so, are there people out there better than me? Maybe probably, you know,

 

Iris Goldfeder  

but are they gonna get you the results that I know I’m gonna get you? Probably not the way that I’m going to do it. Are they going to, you know, treat you the way

 

Erin Marcus  

right is the connection there. I mean, there’s so much more that goes into it. Oh, it’s

 

Iris Goldfeder  

Yeah. And I think that people now are looking for that they’re not looking to just work with anybody. They’re looking for that connection.

 

Erin Marcus  

Absolutely. So speaking of connections, yeah. If someone wants to continue this conversation with you and I can segue they aren’t that perfect.

 

Iris Goldfeder  

They can find me. They can find me on LinkedIn. They could find me on Instagram cashflow, creative Facebook guest Oh creative. My LinkedIn is Iris Goldfeder or guests. Oh, creative. Website gassho creative.com My New York just came out. I also have a podcast guest creative presenting the Cookbook Recipes for success and business and marketing and you’re gonna be on that soon. So I can’t wait for that. Um, yeah, so huh? Not hiding. No,

 

Erin Marcus  

no, no, no. Well, awesome. I enjoyed this conversation. We could have gone in 800 different directions but I love having you real conversations about real topics real people this is what’s going on so thank you for your candor your insight your experiences this has been awesome

 

Iris Goldfeder  

thank you for having me on and this has been awesome

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Erin Marcus is an author, speaker and communications specialist helping organizations to “Conquer the Conversation,” and creating improvement in sales, customer service and team dynamics. To bring Erin to your event or business:

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