EPISODE 207 WITH ALEASHA BAHR: EMPOWERING SALES CONVERSATIONS FOR SUCCESS

Ready Yet?! Podcast Episode 206 with guest Aleasha Bahr: Empowering Sales Conversations for Success

Transcribed with Descript

Erin Marcus: All right. Hello. Hello. And welcome to this episode of the ready yet podcast. I’m excited for today’s guest, Alicia Barr, because you know, I love me a woman who loves sales. He loved me a woman who loves sales. So we’re going to talk about sales. I’m going to screw this up, but the matchmaking.

Aleasha Bahr: Matchmaker sales

Erin Marcus: method. Matchmaker sales method. Love it. I should have asked you that earlier again. But before we get into all of the the history, the journey, and all the information, why don’t you give people a little bit of a formal introduction of who you are and what it is that you do.

Aleasha Bahr: Yeah.

Aleasha Bahr: Hi everybody. I’m so excited to be here. I also love women in sales. There’s, they’re usually pretty amazing at it. My approach is very different. The matchmaker sales method is about if it’s a fit, it’s a fact and there’s no selling involved. So it’s fitting instead of selling. And I create custom sales frameworks that convert over 50 percent of your leads.

Aleasha Bahr: And I don’t create those until I’ve understood your offer inside and out, because context is really important for sales conversations.

Erin Marcus: Great. Like, I just love everything about what you say. You don’t even understand. So I’m just gonna do a real quick one, and then we’ll go deeper on the other topic, or we can flip flop it, whatever you want.

Erin Marcus: Custom. Custom frameworks. After you understand the business and the product and the person and all of the things, right? Because these one size fits all, insta tactic, just do this one thing, they don’t work for anybody because they’re missing everything that you just

Aleasha Bahr: said. I totally agree, and I’m very passionate about it.

Erin Marcus: I agree. Yeah. And then the other piece of what did you call it? It’s fitting. It’s not selling. And I think especially. With high ticket, you know, for those of us who love sales, it’s not as big of an issue, but for people who may it sales makes them uncomfortable. You can spend all your effort banging your head against the wall trying to convince them that sales is good, or you can reframe it the way you did and just make it all possible.

Erin Marcus: I love that. Yeah, go talk about that right like stop banging right. It’s one of my things it’s like I refuse to do the bang your head against the wall version of doing business. How can I make it work for me? So I’d love to hear more about like, when you say custom framework so that it’s fitting, not selling, what does that mean to you?

Aleasha Bahr: Yeah. So, I mean, just like you said, somebody comes out and says they’re a sales expert and they have a framework, right? That you follow, you follow this exact script, whether you’re a health practitioner or B2B, you’re going to make sales with it, which. How could you even say with a straight face that those two people should be using the same questions and the same explanation?

Aleasha Bahr: So when I understand your offer and what makes you different and one of my superpowers is being able to put what is different about you into one concise sentence. And I understand who your audience is. Which sometimes you’re not totally sure, but I can help you figure out really fast. Then you reverse engineer the sales strategy.

Aleasha Bahr: So you’ll design, we will design the questions based on who is a fit for your offer. And you can ask questions to make sure, okay, how many hours do you have a week? Oh, okay, great. You have more than enough hours, you know. Are you okay with waiting 90 days to see results? Oh, fantastic. Because that’s about how long it takes.

Aleasha Bahr: And I mean, other things too, right? Let’s say that it’s somebody who’s talking to women and it’s a self care offer. They’re so bad at self care. They feel like horrible about investing in it. And they want to take care of everyone else first. And they say, when you take care of everybody else first, what kind of person do you show up as in their lives?

Aleasha Bahr: Are you a high quality version of yourself? Are you a higher quality? Think about a time when you did take care of yourself. Did you show up differently in each area of your life? So you can ask these questions that are very specific to your audience and what you’re selling and proactively overcome objections and make it all sound like a conversational exchange instead of some interrogation that then is followed by 10 minutes of one person talking alone because it’s a pitch.

Erin Marcus: Right, exactly. And what I, one of the things that your, your example showed me, and this is what I love about a good high integrity sales conversation, is I believe that everything in my business, and it’s something I strive to do, should be of service. Right? If we make sure that everything we do in this business is of service, then even if you say no to me in a sales conversation, you walk away from that conversation knowing something that you didn’t know before.

Erin Marcus: And what I love about your framework is inherently is of service by providing massive clarity to the person that you’re talking to.

Aleasha Bahr: Yeah, that’s a great way of putting it. It’s really helping the person understand their problem even better than before. And and also understanding what you do, because the big issue for people in sales conversations is they can’t explain what they do in a way that sounds valuable.

Erin Marcus: Right. And when we’re, and you know, and that’s so true because when you, if you are lucky enough to figure out and work in your genius zone, the problem is you don’t. It just comes so natural to you, you think everyone can do it. So you either devalue it or you don’t know how to explain it because you probably don’t even know how it happened.

Aleasha Bahr: Yeah. It’s so true. It’s an unconscious competency and you’re just like, just trust me. It’s valuable. And when people experience it, they’re like, this is amazing, but you need to be able to communicate that experience without them having to move forward on it based on like face.

Erin Marcus: Absolutely. And one of the things I love, like to extrapolate what you could do with this framework.

Erin Marcus: So my focus, though, I do teach sales, you know, it’s business strategy with a heavy emphasis on client acquisition. I love that. Mm hmm. None of this is a secret in order for it to work. Like, your goal is not to be manipulative and be sneaky, which means if you figure all of this out within a custom sales framework, you can then just go put

Aleasha Bahr: it in your marketing.

Aleasha Bahr: Yeah, it does. So the messaging, I’m really a messaging expert and it absolutely applies to the messaging on your website the content in your socials and stuff like that. Cause when I discuss audience with somebody, you know, one of the things we talk about is what are their, their challenges and why can’t they see success with other people’s solutions that are supposed to solve it.

Aleasha Bahr: And just based on that alone is like a ton of content. And the other thing,

Erin Marcus: I’m, I just finished writing this and putting this together this weekend. I wrote a ebook Connect as a Human First, and it really is about that content creation. And one of the things that I talk about is don’t ignore the elephant in the room, ride the elephant.

Erin Marcus: Oh, I like that. I haven’t heard that. It’s so like So many people put a sales conversation together in the hopes of not getting an objection because they hate

Aleasha Bahr: that part. Oh, it drives me bananas. If you just, oh, we’re going to pretend like the objections aren’t happening and then they won’t happen. No, just ask them.

Aleasha Bahr: Like, if they’re gonna talk about time, ask them. Try the beforehand.

Erin Marcus: Beforehand. Then it’s not an objection. To your point, it’s just a conversation. Yeah. Like, the objections to me are like a gift. Because you’re telling me, one, what my ideal client potentially has as an obstacle. And if I’m being of service, I need to know that.

Erin Marcus: And two, you’re just telling me what’s important to you.

Aleasha Bahr: Yeah, I mean, almost always objections I found come from a lack of clarity. Like they are confused. I didn’t do a good enough job. And a lot of it, it’s like, you didn’t know that time was an issue for them because you just didn’t ask because it’s an issue for a lot of your prospects.

Aleasha Bahr: And so you just want to act like it’s not there. And maybe it won’t come up. And the elephant. Yeah, just call it out. I also, you know. There’s so many sales strategies that really force you to say things that you would never say to act a way that you would never act. And you’re basically pretending to be someone else.

Aleasha Bahr: I’ve even heard of people who advise like, be really high energy to somebody who’s not high energy. And it comes off really weird on the receiving end. And my advice is if you’re awkward about sales conversations to just say, you know, I feel really awkward about sales conversations, but I want to find out if I can help you.

Aleasha Bahr: And. It’s endearing. I,

Erin Marcus: I look, I do the same thing and I advise the same thing because give people permission to think what they’re already thinking. So now it’s not a distraction.

Aleasha Bahr: Yeah. And it just like establishes, establishes trust. It’s like, okay, like this is not my thing, but let’s find out if what you’re struggling with is something that I have answers.

Aleasha Bahr: But we’ve got

Erin Marcus: to get through it if I’m going to help you. So let’s go. Yes, ride the elephant. It’s not that big a

Aleasha Bahr: deal. Yeah, it’s really not. And actually it can be a strength to say that. And all of a sudden the pressure’s off. You don’t need to be perfect in this conversation anymore, right?

Erin Marcus: And that, that’s another thing that I absolutely love about this idea of a custom framework.

Erin Marcus: And I say that for every part of your business, because you can play to your strengths. You can, it’s, it’s not like in the gym, so when I used to do bodybuilding, we used to spend extra time on our weak side, so that we’d even out, right? You don’t have to do that here, right? You can just go, okay, I suck at that, so let’s go do it this way instead.

Aleasha Bahr: Yeah, like I’m a terrible runner, so let’s walk. So let’s not do that! Exactly. Okay, cool. A walk sounds great. Sales,

Erin Marcus: right? Imagine sales if you just got to do it in a way. In whatever way made you most comfortable.

Aleasha Bahr: Which is going to get more success every time and I haven’t uncovered why the predominant message is that You can’t, you have to be uncomfortable to succeed.

Erin Marcus: You, I was so going to ask you about that. Cause I’m curious where this all came

Aleasha Bahr: from. I don’t know. It drives me bananas. I think that the only thing you can really point back to is somebody wants to make money. So they need to overcomplicate it. Or, you know, maybe in the 1950s, a really aggressive and manipulative approach worked well.

Aleasha Bahr: It’s. You know, 70 years later. So you know, buyers mindsets change. People are more skeptical. They’re more informed, they’re more educated. So. I know that a lot of the sales strategy, especially online, derives from a life insurance strategy in the 1950s. Yes. When they would just scare the shit out of a wife.

Aleasha Bahr: Right. Exactly. That like, heard the husband was going to die and they were going to be destitute if they didn’t

Erin Marcus: buy the long term care insurance world, so I know exactly what you’re. So I know exactly what you’re talking about. And it’s so, so true. These tactics were all come, all came about when nobody had access to the information, which now there’s no information you don’t have access to.

Erin Marcus: Right. It was transactional sales. Totally. I literally remember going and I, it changed while I was in that industry, but I literally remember going to a sales training program for long term care insurance. And the image on the slide was. comparing like, what if I told you you had a 50 percent chance of your house catching on fire, and it was literally of a house burning down.

Erin Marcus: That was what was being taught as the analogy you should be

Aleasha Bahr: making. Yeah, it’s just totally fear and pain and shame based. And You know, it there that I’m not saying it doesn’t work, but I would say it works for the minority of people, less and less

Erin Marcus: people. Yeah.

Aleasha Bahr: And I absolutely agree with you, especially the, the people delivering it.

Aleasha Bahr: So most people do not feel comfortable. Doing that to a prospect and the sales trainers that tell them that they have to this is what you have to do in their best interest is your offer in their best interest, then you need to make them feel really, really bad and then offer your solution as the path, the bridge to.

Aleasha Bahr: The other side of that scenario. And if they don’t take it, then have a nice shitty life, you know, and it’s just a lie. I, I, I know that they didn’t like being sold like that. Most buyers don’t like being sold like that. It has to be done in a very specific way to not feel offensive.

Erin Marcus: You’ve got to be a magician at it.

Erin Marcus: Not be offensive. And the other thing is, depending on what you’re doing, you’re going to end up with a bunch. Like, if you look at the coaching and consulting world, because this is where I’ve seen that so much less and less, but so much, so much, if you sell that way, you end up with a bunch of clients who can’t actually achieve.

Erin Marcus: the outcome you promised them. They can’t. Yes. It’s not that they don’t want it, they literally can’t do it because of how that sale happened.

Aleasha Bahr: Yes. I appreciate that, Erin. I talk about this all the time. The, the other result of someone coming in that way is somebody who came in by being shamed in, who has a victim mentality.

Aleasha Bahr: If they were able to, to get into that mindset that and forced into buying. And a lot of times refunds happen, but either way, even if they come in, they’re not coming in excited. It’s a very different start to the client relationship than somebody saying, Oh, I can’t wait for all the possibilities with you.

Aleasha Bahr: I’m so excited for how well set up you are to get these results based on all of my other clients. I have no problem

Erin Marcus: with people being nervous. Yeah, people are a lot of people are nervous when they start working with me more because they’re like, oh my gosh Okay, here we go this we’re gonna do the thing and it’s big next step So I get it.

Erin Marcus: So the nerves and the fear are fine. It’s shame and victimy That you can’t possibly have renewals I mean, maybe that’s why they have to hit it so hardcore because they have their, you know, the churn rate is just a monster.

Aleasha Bahr: Yeah. Well, and then honestly, the person, you burn the lead. So if they say no, it’s like, all right, you’re dead to me.

Aleasha Bahr: So many sales are done through followup. It’s like 80 percent or something is the percentage and you’re just. Completely wasting that opp making that opportunity not even possible. Okay,

Erin Marcus: so where let’s let’s help some people out here. Where should they start? Aside from calling you. Like, we can just lay lay that out right there.

Erin Marcus: Aside from calling you and getting external help, because they think, especially with this type of thing, you know, and and you probably hear the same thing I do, that just breaks my heart and frustrates me to, you know, frustrates me to no end. Oh my God, I wish I would have met you before I did XYZ. What should someone do if they want to look at what they’re already doing and make some easy, easy wins, easy

Aleasha Bahr: improvements?

Aleasha Bahr: Yeah. So, I mean, there’s a lot of free content on my podcast that helps lay things out very specifically. But to start I would focus on fitting. So what makes somebody a fit to work with you and what makes somebody not a fit to work with you and feel empowered to tell someone if they’re not a fit and have an alternative resource for them.

Aleasha Bahr: So, I mean, I was just talking to somebody who was like, I want to work with these people, but I can’t because they don’t have enough budget. Right. And you don’t want to be like, Oh, you’re broke. You sorry. Can’t help you. Bye. Instead, you want to say, I have this alternative for you that will really help and really like honor yourself that you’re at a different place now where you don’t need to take those opportunities.

Aleasha Bahr: And there’s a beauty to, to the only goal. Not being a yes. It’s really just understanding if the other person is in the place you need them to be to get results with you and also share that information with them. You know, let them know, Oh, great. You already have been in business for three years. When businesses have been in business for three years, I am able to clean up their books in a way that immediately gets them an extra 20%.

Aleasha Bahr: You know, like those are the things people want to hear that make them a fit for your offer. Love

Erin Marcus: it. Totally. So they need to check out your podcast. What’s it

Aleasha Bahr: called? Sales is not a dirty word.

Erin Marcus: Sales is not a dirty word for all sorts of help. Personal question, how did you end up here?

Aleasha Bahr: In like, online entrepreneurship you mean?

Aleasha Bahr: Sure.

Erin Marcus: I always answer that question kicking and screaming. But yeah, like, how did this become your thing?

Aleasha Bahr: Yeah, that’s, that’s fun. So I was always a natural seller. I used to sell digital marketing for corporate. And the problem with being natural at sales is that you never have to take sales training and you never really explain what you do.

Aleasha Bahr: So people ask you, Oh, how are you so good at what you do? And you say, well, I don’t really sell. And everyone’s like, okay, well, what the hell does that mean? You know, so

Erin Marcus: I ask you a bunch of questions and then you just do what I ask you to do.

Aleasha Bahr: Well, and so like, I’ve, I’ve given this a name and a methodology.

Aleasha Bahr: It’s the matchmaker sales method is the way that a natural person sells. And the reason that they say that they’re not really selling is because they’re not, they’re fitting, which includes telling someone when they’re not a fit. So they’re like, actually, you don’t need this solution. You need this other solution.

Aleasha Bahr: And people. Love it. They just want somebody who has their best interests in mind. And I had my own marketing agency too, before the sales coaching shift. And that was really helpful to have that in the trenches work because it helps with sales to have good marketing. Of course. AnD I just noticed a much bigger need because there’s just really bad sales training and people just burn through a lot of money and they dread it and it kills their confidence and they can’t get people in who need them.

Aleasha Bahr: And, you know, I’m sure you see this a lot when people say, I wish I had known about you sooner. The reason that they spent money on all these other people is they were really great at marketing and horrible at delivery. Yeah. And those are the people who win, right? And that’s not fair. And I want to help people who aren’t good at marketing and sales win because they deserve to win.

Erin Marcus: It’s so true. One of the horrible truth bombs that was told to me when I first started in my business was you don’t get the business you deserve, you get the business you ask for. And I didn’t completely understand it at the time. I so understand it now. It’s It’s a brutal truth. It is a brutal truth. So you have to find a way to comfortably

Aleasha Bahr: ask for the business.

Aleasha Bahr: Yeah, absolutely. I mean, it’s like people being like, Oh, I’m so good that they’ll just notice and give me a raise. That doesn’t happen. You need to ask for it. Well, and here

Erin Marcus: in the Midwest, the way I describe it is while you’re being nice, not asking them, they’re being nice, not bothering you. And so everybody’s very nice, but nothing’s actually

Aleasha Bahr: happening.

Aleasha Bahr: Well, except for the person who’s asking, that asshole is getting promoted. The big, the

Erin Marcus: idiot who has no idea what they’re doing and he’s braver than he is smart. They’re doing great.

Aleasha Bahr: Yeah. And you’re sitting there frustrated. Like I’ve worked overtime. I’ve done all this extra stuff. stuff. I have these incredible results and I know how easy it is to, to get really I don’t even know what the word is.

Aleasha Bahr: I don’t know if it’s like a high horse or soapbox. It’s very resentful. It’s a resentful place. Like why? You know, but that’s like not even a productive use of energy. It’s just how can you put yourself in a better position because you’re the only one who has control over what you want. Everyone else is just thinking about themselves.

Erin Marcus: Right. And it’s just how brains work, right? We all do that. And real quick, one of the byproducts of this idea of fit is when you’re not a good fit, and you give someone a referral and a resource, instead of selling to them, you create raving fans that refer you a bunch

Aleasha Bahr: of business. Yes, they do. Because they know that you’re trustworthy.

Erin Marcus: No, I absolutely love it. Quick question, what are you most proud of?

Aleasha Bahr: I was asked this recently, I think that what I’m most proud of, because it’s a very intentional effort is that I am not lost to any one identity. So it’s very easy for someone to lose themselves as a business owner or to lose themselves in being a mom or a wife or a friend or an individual.

Aleasha Bahr: And I very intentionally make sure. to have all of those identities at once and balance them versus kind of forgetting myself and my needs, which is so easy to do.

Erin Marcus: Absolutely. I love it. I love it. So we’ve already given people tons of information on your subject matter expertise. Let’s give them what I call, if we just don’t do what I did, and we’ll, right, you’ll be further faster, right?

Erin Marcus: Lessen their learning, shorten their learning curve. What have you tried that just like, yeah, just don’t do this? So

Aleasha Bahr: this is interesting. When I first started, In the sales coaching business, I thought what a sexy offer to be paid for performance. If you don’t sell, I won’t make any money. It seems like a no brainer, but humans are weird.

Aleasha Bahr: And their psychology is irrational a lot of the times. So people were actually de incentivized to sell because if they sold something, they paid me money.

Erin Marcus: So, right. It sounds like a guarantee and what it ended up being is.

Aleasha Bahr: They didn’t do the work because if they did the work, they would have to pay somebody and they didn’t want to pay anybody, whether they were, it was crazy.

Aleasha Bahr: And this happens all the time with, this is for people who like think, Oh, well, if I just give them a free session or if I just give them a free, whatever, or nobody does anything with free information. So having somebody invest. Is actually for them as well so that they get the result because they’re not going to a lot of times people will only invest the amount that they’re okay with losing because to invest in amount they’re not okay with losing is scary.

Aleasha Bahr: And that’s also the amount that’s going to make them show up. I’m not talking about like, Oh, you’re not going to be able to pay your rent and put food on the table. I’m not trying to do that. There’s

Erin Marcus: a difference between pushing your boundaries and doing

Aleasha Bahr: dumb things. Yeah, so for anybody who is struggling with like what to charge or how to charge or if to charge, I mean, that was the big lesson.

Aleasha Bahr: Also I think we’ve all experienced this one a few times. Some money is not better than no money. That nightmare client is not worth it. They are going to suck your time, your energy, and ultimately make you less money.

Erin Marcus: Because you’re too exhausted and burnt out to go make any

Aleasha Bahr: money with better clients.

Aleasha Bahr: And that’s one that you tell people and you just don’t believe it until you do it yourself. And then you do it like two more times and then you’re like, okay, I’m really not ever going to do it again. And like a few years

Erin Marcus: slips through and then someone slips through, right? Oh my God. I’ve done that. We’re like, this is it.

Erin Marcus: We’re not doing this anymore. Our marketing. Our avatar is so dialed in, I’m showing up on my authenticity so the people who act like this won’t like me, and then one slips through. And you’re like, really? We’re here again?

Aleasha Bahr: Every time I fired a client that was taking too much of my time and energy, I increased my income.

Aleasha Bahr: It’s so

Erin Marcus: true. I had a woman who worked for me in my last business and she had this thing about her where, and we worked with families with aging parents, so those aging parents were one, aging, two, massive trauma. They’re downsizing out of houses. There’s always a health problem. Like, this was not an easy situation.

Erin Marcus: And so different personalities handle that in different ways. And I would see over and over and over again that the meaner someone was to her, the harder she worked to try

Aleasha Bahr: to win them over. That’s a terrible cycle to be

Erin Marcus: in. It’s a terrible cycle to be in. And I used to intervene, you know, my role was to intervene and create her boundaries for her as the owner of that business.

Erin Marcus: But we see. Those versions of ourselves every now and then, like, why am I to, to your whole point though, like to make this come full circle, the beauty of fitting, not selling is you stand to just a better chance of preventing it.

Aleasha Bahr: Totally know who’s not a fit. So when people think about marketing and selling in the beginning.

Aleasha Bahr: They’re just thinking about who they want to attract and they totally miss who they want to repel. And you want to call out who you’re repelling. If you’re this person, you won’t. Oh, I

Erin Marcus: do that right on my landing pages. Who is this for? And who is this for not, who is this not for? And I will literally say, if you’re like this, you won’t like me.

Erin Marcus: I make it a break. I know, right? No blame. No shame. You won’t like me.

Aleasha Bahr: Yeah, well, and that’s okay, right? There’s no judgment in it. It’s just simply we’re not a fit and there’s someone else. who will be a fit for you. Yeah. Like I had a woman on my LinkedIn say, like, why are you swearing in your posts? It’s so unprofessional.

Aleasha Bahr: And I said, I would just mute me because we’re not a fit. Right. It’s okay. Yeah. Go find someone who’s not swearing. Like that’s. Totally. Okay. I’m not going to adjust myself for people that I don’t want to work. I don’t want to work with someone who’s offended by swearing. That’s they won’t like me. They won’t like me.

Aleasha Bahr: Yeah. And I, or I would have to adjust myself. And one of the things that’s really great about being a business owner is that. You don’t have to do that anymore if you don’t want to. So, I mean, I’m gonna ride that benefit till the end, you know.

Erin Marcus: I listen to my boyfriend on his business, on his calls, and he works for a magnificent company with wonderful, wonderful people.

Erin Marcus: And every now and then there’s issues, and I’m like, my God, it’s been almost 10 years since I’ve had to deal with anyone I don’t like.

Aleasha Bahr: What a gift. I know. I mean, my husband works in a traditional company and it’s just like nobody is able to say what, say the thing that everyone needs to say and everyone just like is so inefficient and overworked and getting three jobs, but being paid for one and it’s just.

Aleasha Bahr: An epidemic in corporate. Yeah, I

Erin Marcus: mean, and like, give yourself this gift. I would wrap this up by, it’s not even the strategy and tactic and assistance that you offer. Real, I mean, if you really think about it, it’s give yourself through your business, this gift of next level freedom to not have to deal with people that you don’t like to not have to deal with people who don’t like you, that you can’t help that it won’t work like the elevation of what you’re able to accomplish when you get to keep your head in that world.

Erin Marcus: It is way beyond one

Aleasha Bahr: sale. It is. And I mean, there are so many cons to being a business owner. It is not easy. Why would you rob yourself of one of the pros? 100%.

Erin Marcus: Absolutely love it. Yeah. If people want to continue this conversation with you, and I highly, highly, highly recommend they do. How do they

Aleasha Bahr: find you?

Aleasha Bahr: So I would go to my podcast, sales is not a dirty word, and listen to the, the episode how to get better at sales. Love it.

Erin Marcus: How to get better at sales. Sales is not a dirty word. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you so much for your time and your energy and your insights and your whole approach to this. I absolutely love it.

Erin Marcus: As far as I’m concerned, you cannot help enough people. This is fantastic.

Aleasha Bahr: Thank you so much, Erin. It’s so wonderful meeting other women and people who are aligned with this message. Awesome.

Erin Marcus: Thank you.

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